Seek to understand.

I have wrestled with my thoughts for days. 
I know everyone else has too. 
I have prayed about what to say. 
Not on social media but to our boys.

And today I had an answer to prayer.

I was driving down the road and I felt like the Lord said “teach them to dwell with understanding.”

You know the verse. 
It’s not a popular one.

But I knew instantly it was the answer to my prayer. It was what our boys needed to know about this case. About what’s happening in our nation right now.

To seek to understand is a POWERFUL way to live. A way to honor others. A way to love authentically.

So I prayed about how to share that with them. I wanted to keep it short and simple.

I wanted them to hear me. 
I wanted them to listen.

After we picked Ty up from school, we were driving down the road and he said “Mrs. XXX let us talk about the Kavanaugh case in class today.”

I said “Wow, that was courageous. How did that go?”

He said “It went good. We were only allowed to talk about facts and not our opinions.”

His history teacher is excellent. Brilliant. Professional. I honestly can’t imagine a better person to lead a discussion about that with 8th graders.

I knew this was when I needed to share that verse. So I said it. I said “The Bible says we are to dwell with understanding. Can I just emphasize how powerful it is to learn to listen to people? To hear their side? It’s so important you guys. Please learn to listen. Learn to sit with people who see things differently than you and seek to understand.”

They said they will.

I know it’s not profound. 
I know there are 1,000 other things I could have said.

I also know they already know to keep their hands to themselves, to not get drunk, to not shame victims, to honor women, to make wise choices, all of that.

But dwelling with one another with understanding is a discipline & a choice that can set the tone for a healthy life with rich relationships where different opinions and perspectives make us stronger, not afraid.

More empathetic, not defensive.

The Lord may give me another verse tomorrow. I don’t know. But today’s lesson was powerful for me, too.

I will NOT live in fear as a boy mom. 
I will teach them to dwell with understanding.